AnnaLynne McCord recently opened up in Cosmopolitan about a past alleged sexual assault and tough religious upbringing.
On Monday, she stopped by Access Hollywood Live, where she continued to speak candidly about the past she’s working to overcome.
On her how her parent’s childhood discipline affected her: “[There was] bending over the bed ritualistically. For me it went too long into my teenage years and I hit puberty and unfortunately it became very sexual in my mind, a violation in my mind, that was not their intent. I understand that… I shut off the sensation of my body … In my sex life I would be just like, ‘Oh no, I don’t feel anything, do more, whatever’… I was so numb and I couldn’t find intimacy because I shut off that ability to connect.”
On rebelling against expectations: “I got into a lot of trouble when I was young because I [rebelled] against the belief systems in [my] religious background that women were to submit to their husbands. I thought that was crazy. I was 9 years old and I told my mom, ‘Let me get this straight, I have to do everything daddy says my whole childhood and then I can get married and I have to do everything the dude says?’
On her “crazy” early relationships with men: “My self-worth was zero, my self-esteem was zero… There was no connection at all. I didn’t know what a connection between a relationship and physical contact was. It was two totally different things for me… There was the one side of me that knew that my parents loved me but then when I was hit it was like, people who love me hit me, you need to hit me if you really love me and if you’re not gonna do it, I will make you do it… I drove some boys crazy.”
On her regrets for initially not taking a stand after an alleged sexual assault: “I did nothing, I just laid there, and did nothing. I didn’t stand up for myself and that was the hardest thing for me to forgive myself was that I didn’t take a stand.”
AnnaLynne, who is working with the “I Choose” campaign to help other victims of assault find the courage to speak up, continued her candid discussion on Tuesday’s Access Hollywood.
-- Jesse Spero